5 Tips on caring for your elderly parents at home.

Whether it’s your home or theirs, these 5 tips will help you navigate their care. 

Caring for elderly parents at home, whether in yours or theirs, can be a daunting task. However, thoughtful consideration of all the ins-and-outs and a bit of planning can make it more manageable. These are our 5 tips to help keep you organized and sane.

While some seniors prefer to age in place, others may decide on an assisted living arrangement. If your parents are mentally fit, you can help them plan for that. The problem here is that they may wait too long to make the move. The first step is to talk with your parents about their wishes before they can no longer make an informed decision. Be considerate but frank.

1. Plan ahead for taking care of your elderly parent(s) at home.

Before you do “have the talk” with your loved ones, you must have a good understanding of their ability to manage the activities of daily living:

• Toileting.
• Bathing.
• Dressing.
• Cooking, eating, and clean up.
• Taking medications.
• Mobility and transferring from bed or chair.
• Memory issues.

If they can manage on their own, you’re in great shape. If not, think about solutions: in-home support staff vs. you or another family member.

2. Get organized.

Create a list of tasks and assign them to daily, weekly, and monthly categories and evaluate your parents’ abilities to carry out simple chores:

• Meal preparation: Are you worried your parents are forgetful or inattentive to food preparation, cooking, regular meals? A way to address the problem could be a local Meals on Wheels program.
• Grocery shopping: Most often, this is a weekly chore, but it could also be bi-weekly or even monthly. Many stores offer online shopping and delivery in urban areas. If not, is there a personal shopper in your area?
• Housekeeping: Who will take out the trash and how often? Who will vacuums, dust, or do the dishes? Laundry duties, kitchen clean up, and deeper cleaning needs all should be considered. 
• Yard maintenance: Can you hire a lawn or garden service? Is there a handyman service in your area to handle simple repairs?

It helps to make a note every time your parents need help. By the time a week has passed, you’ll have a good idea of where they need help and how often.

3. Be honest with yourself, your partner, and your parents.

Once you know what’s needed, be realistic about your ability to take care of those tasks. If you don’t think you can manage it all, consider what you can do, and what you need help with.

4. Financial concerns about caring for your elderly parents.

There are real costs to caring for elderly parents, and they can add up. You’ll need to assess your parents’ income and expenses. How much can you contribute financially? An honest appraisal of the finances prepares you to plan ahead to fill the gaps.

Check for federal, state, or local benefit programs your parents may be eligible to receive. Some examples are reduced-cost prescription programs, Medicaid, in-home health support, or senior discounts for goods or services like haircuts, restaurants, etc.

If you work, can you afford to quit your job or reduce your hours? Remember to think about your own benefits, such as health insurance, disability benefits, retirement, etc. Does your employer have family leave or flex-time policies that you could utilize? 

It’s also important to think about your employability if you return to work later. Will your skills be up-to-date? Think about how long it might be before you can go back to work; how will you explain a long absence from the workforce and reassure prospective employers.

5. Getting help around the house with eldercare.

With the best will in the world, you’ll need a break from time to time. If you investigate respite care now, you’ll have options and be ready for the day you need time off. Try to plan for respite care 3 or 4 times a month so that you don’t burn out. Some ideas for where to find the help you need are:

• An adult day program gives you some relief and allows your parents to spend time with friends.
• Lining up a caregiver to help out can help ease your load, whether it’s a few hours a day or a week.
• Look for volunteers to visit your parents or take them out for a few hours.
• Ask for help when you need it. Maybe it’s buying a few groceries or cooking dinner once in a while, most family members or friends are willing to help.

These 5 tips are not meant to be all-inclusive. But if you’re caring for your parents at home, it’s a good start. Other considerations will occur to you as you work through these items. With planning, you can make things a lot easier for everyone.